Hash Songs

Hash songs are what make us different. Its not just beer merry, every song tells a story. Learn it, become a Hasher through and True

THE COLOUR SONG

There’s a woman in RED

And she loves to give great HEAD

CHORUS

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh oh, oh, oh, oh

There’s a woman in BLUE

And she likes it TWO by TWO

There’s a woman in GREEN

And she likes it IN BETWEEN

There’s a woman in PINK

And she makes my finger STINK

There’s a woman in BLACK

And she likes it from the BACK

There’s a woman in BROWN

And she loves it upside DOWN

There’s a woman in SCARLET

And she loves it in her IN-LET

There’s a woman in PURPLE

And she likes it when its DOUBLE

There’s a woman in WHITE

And she likes it when its TIGHT

There’s a woman in GOLD

And she loves it when its BOLD.

There’s a woman in YELLOW

And she likes it down BELOW

There’s a woman in CREAM

She loves when you make her SCREAM

I DON’T WANT TO JOIN THE ARMY

On Monday l touched her on the ankle,

On Tuesday l touched her on the knee,

On Wednesday with success l lifted up her dress,

On Thursday I saw it, Corblimey

On Friend l had my hand upon it,

On Saturday night she gave my balls a tweak,

On Sunday after supper, I rammed the bastard up her,

And now l’m paying 7/6 a week, Corblimey!

CHORUS

I don’t want to join the Army, I don’t want to go to war,

l ‘d rather hang around Piccadilly underground

Living on the earnings of a high born lady

I don’t want a bayonet up my ass’ole, I don’t want my bollock shot away

I’d rather stay in HeartLand, in sunny, sunny Lagos

And fornicatemy fucking life away, Corblimey!

Call on the Territorial Army

Call on the Navy and Marine

Call on me little brother

Me Sister and me Mother

For fuck sake don’t call me, Corblimey!

MY MOTHER MAKES SWEET APPLE CIDER

My mother makes sweet apple cider,

My father makes synthetic gin,

My sister makes love in the evening,

My God how the money rolls in.

CHORUS

Rolls in, rolls in, my God how the money rolls in, rolls in,

Rolls in, rolls in my God how the money rolls in.

My mother’s a bawdy housekeeper,

Each night when the evening grows dim,

She hangs out a little red lantern,

My God how the money rolls in.

My Cousin’s a Harley Street surgeon,

With instruments long, sharp and thin,

He only does one operation,

My God how the money rolls in.

Uncle Joe is a registered plumber,

His business in hole and in tin,

He’ll plug up your hole for a tanner,

My God how the money roll in.

My brother’s a slum missionary,

He saves fallen women from sin,

He’ll save you a blond for a dollar,

My God how the money rolls in.

My grandad sells cheap prophylactics,

He punctures the teats with a pin,

My Grandma does cheap operations,

My God how the money rolls in.

I’ve shares in the very best companies,

In tramways tobacco and tin,

In brothels in Rio de Janero,

My God how the money rolls in.

My father sent field guns to Franco,

My brother raised boats for Berlin,

My uncle sent scrap iron to Tokyo,

My God how the money rolls in.

My sister’s a barmaid in Sydney.

For a shilling she’ll strip to the skin,

She’s stripping from morning to midnight,

My God how the money rolls in.

My aunt keeps a girl’s seminary

Teaching young girls to begin,

She doesn’t say where they’re to finish,

My God how the money rolls in.

I lost all my cash on the horses,

I’m sick from the illicit gin,

I’m falling in love with my father,

My God what a mess I am in.

ROLL ME OVER IN THE CLOVER

This is number one and the fun has just begun,

Roll me over, lay me down and do it again,

Roll me over in the clover

Roll me over, lay me down and do it again.

Oh, this is number two and my hand is on her shoe,

Oh, this is number three and my hands is on her knee,

Oh, this is number four and we’re rolling on the floor,

Oh, this is number five and the bee is in the hive,

Oh, this is number six and she said she liked my tricks

Oh, this is number seven and we’re in our seventh heaven,

Oh, this is number eight and the nurse is at the gate,

Oh, this is number nine and the twins are doing fine,

Oh, this is number ten and we’re at it once again,

Oh, this is number eleven and we start again from seven,

Oh, this is number twelve and she said don’t blow a valve

Oh, this is number twenty and she that was plenty,

Oh, this is number thirty and she said that was dirty,

Oh, this number forty and she said “now you are naughty”

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